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Do you love God—but feel like you’re slowly drifting away from Him, and you don’t know why? Are you scared that questioning your church—or your faith—might mean losing everything you love? Do you constantly second-guess your emotions, your voice, even your own intuition—wondering if you’re the problem? Are you exhausted from trying to be good enough, faithful enough, spiritual enough… and still feeling like you fall short? Do you feel spiritually homeless—longing for a safe space where you can be honest, messy, and still welcomed with open arms?
If that all sounds a little too familiar, take a deep breath. You’ve found a place to land.
Healing Religious Trauma is a podcast designed to help you:
1. Rebuild your relationship with a safe, loving God.
2. Feel emotionally and spiritually safe enough to ask honest questions.
3. Hear God’s voice for yourself—without fear, shame, or outside filters.
4. Let go of guilt and reclaim your voice, your worth, and your inner peace.
5. Find a gentle, supportive space where spiritual transformation and healing are real and faith still matters.
Hi, I’m Debra.
A woman of faith who spent decades trying to earn God’s love by doing everything “right.” I was the helper, the volunteer, the spiritual overachiever. But underneath all the striving, I felt disconnected—from God, from myself, and from the woman I longed to be.
Like so many of the women I now serve, I kept trying to pray harder, serve more, and fix myself—hoping the fog would lift, the guilt would fade, and I’d finally feel close to God’s love again. But none of it worked.
What changed?
I finally realized that it wasn’t my faith that was failing—it was the version of it I’d been handed. The one rooted in fear, control, and silence. So I started to untangle the lies, listen for God’s true voice, and walk in the kind of healing that leads to spiritual freedom—not fear.
And the outcome?
I created the kind of compassionate, honest, Spirit-led healing journey I couldn’t find anywhere else. One that doesn’t ask you to throw everything away—just to lay down what was never yours to carry. And that’s exactly why this podcast was born.
If you’re ready to untangle what’s been keeping you stuck—and find real, spiritual healing that doesn’t ask you to lose your faith in the process—this podcast is for you.
Each episode will help you rebuild your trust in God, rest from spiritual performance, and rediscover the voice you were never meant to silence.
You’ll hear real stories, soul-grounded teaching, and healing truths rooted in compassion and true connection.
You can't heal what you can't name.
Take the Quiz – Uncover which of the 12 Hidden Aftershocks of religious trauma are keeping you stuck—and get your FREE Essentials Starter Kit: my book, mini-course, reading circle, and community of women who get it. ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com
Join the Coming Home Journey – Go from stuck to free. From exile to home. Find your voice, heal your faith, and finally feel close to God again. Six months of group coaching through the 5 Phases of Healing. TheComingHomeJourney.com
No perfection required. Just bring your questions and your favorite tea. This space was made to feel like home.
ABOUT
Debra Shafer is a spiritual healing coach for Christian women and the creator of the Coming Home Journey—a gentle, soul-level pathway to help women untangle religious trauma, rebuild trust in God, and find peace without walking away from their faith. As the founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle, Debra brings together decades of experience in personal ministry, Biblical psychology, and trauma-informed mentoring. She knows what it’s like to love God deeply while wrestling with fear, shame, and silence. Known for her voice of gentle clarity, healing, and truth, she now walks women home to the God they always hoped was real. Around here, the tea is hot, the wisdom is hard-won, and no question is off limits.
Episodes
Wednesday Oct 29, 2025
Wednesday Oct 29, 2025
Have you ever felt like your presence only matters when you're doing something for someone else?
Maybe you've spent years showing up for everyone - listening to their struggles, meeting their needs, celebrating their wins. But when it's your turn? When you're hurting or exhausted or just need someone to see you? The room goes quiet. The phone doesn't ring. And you tell yourself, "It's fine. I don't need much."
If you've learned to be "low-maintenance" and the easy one who doesn't cause problems, or if you've been making yourself small and invisible just to keep the peace - this episode is for you.
Episode Description
If you've been living as though your needs don't count, you're not alone - and you're not too much. Today we're exploring one of the most painful hidden barriers of religious trauma: the belief "I Don't Matter."
Through Debra's story - from having major decisions made without her voice to discovering that God wasn't the one making her invisible - we'll uncover how religious environments can teach women that self-sacrifice means self-erasure and that asking for help is selfish.
You'll discover how Jesus treated every individual as supremely valuable through His divine healing methods, and learn that the sacred parts of your soul were meant to be cherished, not trampled.
This isn't about becoming more demanding - it's about discovering that you matter completely, not because of what you accomplish or how perfectly you serve, but because God placed immeasurable value on you when He created you.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why minimizing your needs and making yourself invisible keeps you disconnected from authentic care - and how to recognize when you're doing it
→ How Jesus' far-seeing intuition took in the necessities of each person's case - from the blind man to the bleeding woman to Mary and Martha
→ The sacred parts of your soul that were meant to flourish in safety, to be seen with tenderness, to be valued without performance
→ The revolutionary truth that just as a baby doesn't have to earn her parents' care, you don't have to earn God's attention and love
→ One simple act of self-care this week that reflects your inherent worth - not because you earned it, but because you matter
Healing Truth
You matter completely - not because of what you do, but because of who you are. Jesus' far-seeing intuition still takes in all the necessities of your case. Your pain still moves His heart. Your needs are sacred to Him. The sacred parts of your soul that were meant to be cherished aren't too damaged for His healing touch. The woman who allows herself to be seen, who honors her needs without guilt, who receives care without feeling she must immediately reciprocate - she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be remembered beneath all the minimizing.
Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to unravel religious trauma, instill God's truth, and create your new story alongside women who truly understand. In Milestone 8, study Jesus' divine healing methods and discover how to restore the sacred parts of your soul. Get all the details at TheComingHomeJourney.com.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who love God deeply but feel exhausted by religious performance and pressure. I know this path personally - I've had my voice dismissed and my needs overlooked - and I've seen what happens when women finally believe they matter: they discover they were always worthy of being cherished.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you see that you matter completely, would you share it with someone who needs this truth? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women discover that their needs aren't too much and their presence is a gift.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Wednesday Oct 22, 2025
Wednesday Oct 22, 2025
Have you ever felt like you just... don't fit?
Maybe you've been told you're too sensitive, too analytical, too emotional, too intense, or that you ask too many questions. Maybe you think too much, feel too deeply, or see things in ways that other people just don't understand. Or maybe nobody said it out loud - but you sensed it. You picked up on the subtle messages that your natural way of being was somehow wrong.
If you've ever wondered "Why can't I just have simple faith like everyone else?" or felt like the way God made you was somehow a mistake - this episode is for you.
Episode Description
If you've been hiding your true self because you thought being "different" meant being defective, you're not alone - and nothing is wrong with you. Today we're exploring one of the most isolating hidden barriers of religious trauma: the belief "I'm Different (in the wrong way)."
Through Debra's transformative story - from being shushed for her enthusiasm to discovering that "enthusiasm" literally means "God within" - we'll uncover how religious environments can label your God-given traits as flaws and teach you to suppress your spiritual intelligence.
You'll discover that what you thought were defects are actually divine faculties - spiritual intelligence designed to connect you directly to God and fulfill your unique purpose. Your sensitivity, depth, questions, and way of seeing aren't problems to fix but gifts to celebrate.
This isn't about becoming more like everyone else - it's about discovering that your differences are your divine design, and the world needs exactly what you have to offer.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why feeling "different" in religious spaces often means your spiritual faculties are operating - and how to recognize your unique gifts
→ What spiritual intelligence really is - the mind faculties like intuition, perception, curiosity, imagination, and heart's desire that God installed in you at birth
→ How traits labeled as "too much" (sensitivity, analytical nature, questioning spirit, creativity) are actually evidence of your divine equipment
→ The revolutionary truth that different doesn't equal defective - it equals divine design for your specific calling
→ One simple practice to identify and honor your strongest spiritual faculty instead of hiding it
Healing Truth
You're not different in the wrong way. You're different in exactly the right way for your divine calling. What you've been told are flaws are actually spiritual faculties - divine intelligence designed to connect you with God. Your sensitivity is spiritual perception. Your analytical nature is divine wisdom. Your questions are curiosity seeking truth. The woman who celebrates her unique spiritual intelligence instead of suppressing it - she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be remembered beneath all the hiding.
Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to unravel religious trauma, instill God's truth, and create your new story alongside women who truly understand. In Milestone 7, dive deep into your spiritual intelligence and discover all the mind faculties God gave you to connect directly with Him.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Coming Home Journey. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who love God deeply but feel exhausted by religious performance and pressure. I know this path personally - I've been shushed for my God-given enthusiasm - and I've seen what happens when women finally celebrate their differences instead of suppressing them: they discover they were always exactly who God intended them to be.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you see that being different isn't being defective, would you share it with someone who needs this freedom? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women discover that their sensitivity, depth, and questions are spiritual intelligence, not flaws.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Saturday Oct 18, 2025
Saturday Oct 18, 2025
Have you ever done everything right... and still felt like something was fundamentally wrong with you?
Maybe you've been the good girl your whole life - the rule-follower who memorized scripture, volunteered at church, showed up early and stayed late. You've tried so hard to get it all right. But somehow, it still wasn't enough. You still felt behind, disorganized, like you were failing at faith itself - even though you couldn't pinpoint exactly what you were doing wrong.
If you've ever felt exhausted from trying to follow all the rules while the goalposts kept moving, or if you've wondered why being a "good Christian" still leaves you feeling like a spiritual failure - this episode is for you.
Episode Description
If you're exhausted from religious performance and still feeling like you can't get it right, you're not alone - and you're not failing. Today we're exploring one of the most depleting hidden barriers of religious trauma: the belief "I'm a Failure."
Through Debra's powerful story - from having every business dream shut down to discovering she could be brilliant AND imperfect at the same time - we'll uncover how religious environments create impossible standards that keep Christian women on an endless treadmill of trying harder.
You'll discover the revolutionary difference between religious rules that exhaust you and divine principles that set you free, and learn why God's character isn't a measuring stick for your worthiness but a compass that guides you toward growth.
This isn't about lowering standards - it's about discovering that principles are about direction, not perfection, and that you're not failing when you're learning.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why the exhausting cycle of rule-following never brings the peace you're seeking - and how to recognize when you're measuring yourself by broken systems
→ The difference between religious rules (external, performance-driven) and divine principles (internal, character-aligned) - and why this changes everything
→ How God's principles like gentleness, individuality, free will, and love become your compass instead of condemnation
→ The liberating truth that principles are about trajectory, not perfection - you don't have to stay in the center of the lane to be heading in the right direction
→ One simple practice using divine principles to make decisions with clarity and peace instead of fear and guilt
Healing Truth
You're not a spiritual failure. You've been trying to navigate by rules that were designed to measure and control instead of by principles that guide and transform. God's principles aren't new rules to follow perfectly - they're a compass pointing you toward His character. The woman who makes decisions from internal wisdom instead of external pressure, who lives from character alignment instead of performance anxiety - she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be remembered beneath all the striving.
Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to unravel religious trauma, instill God's truth, and create your new story alongside women who truly understand. Learn 10 divine principles in depth and discover how to navigate life by God's character instead of human rules. Get all the details at TheComingHomeJourney.com.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who love God deeply but feel exhausted by religious performance and pressure. I know this path personally - I've had every dream dismissed as spiritual failure - and I've seen what happens when women finally navigate by principles instead of rules: they discover they were never failing, just using the wrong map.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you see that you're not failing at faith, would you share it with someone who needs this freedom? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women find their way from performance pressure to principle-based peace.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Wednesday Oct 08, 2025
Wednesday Oct 08, 2025
Have you ever cried... and then felt ashamed for crying?
Maybe you poured out your heart to someone you trusted - a spiritual leader, a friend, even God - and instead of being held in your pain, you were told to have more faith, pray harder, or just get over it. Or maybe you've learned to hide your struggles altogether because somewhere along the way, you started believing that your pain was proof something was fundamentally wrong with you.
If you've ever felt like expressing honest emotion meant you were spiritually weak, or if you've been waiting for others to notice you're hurting while never actually telling them you need help - this episode is for you.
Episode Description
If you've been hiding your heart because you thought your pain made you unlovable, you're not alone - and you're not damaged goods. Today we're exploring one of the most devastating hidden barriers of religious trauma: the belief "I'm Unlovable."
Through Debra's deeply personal story - from being told her grief was spiritual adultery to discovering God's inexpressible love in sacred sorrow - we'll uncover how religious environments can silence women's pain and teach them that honest expression equals weak faith.
You'll discover an ancient language of worship that was stolen from you but has always been yours - the practice of lament - and learn why your pain doesn't repel God but actually moves His heart toward you.
This isn't about becoming less emotional - it's about discovering that nothing you feel is too much for God, and that your wounds don't make you damaged, they make you beautifully, achingly human.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why hiding your pain and minimizing your needs keeps you disconnected from authentic love - and how to recognize when you're doing it
→ The ancient practice of lament - bringing your unfiltered heart directly to God without cleaning it up first
→ How God's ḥesed (loyal, covenant love) meets you in your deepest places, not because your pain disappeared but because you've encountered His presence in the middle of it
→ The difference between being unloved and being under-nurtured - and why this reframe changes everything
→ One simple practice to start bringing honest emotion to God each day and watch for the moment when His inexpressible love breaks through
Healing Truth
Your pain doesn't make you unlovable. It makes you human. And God's ḥesed - His loyal, covenant love - is specifically for humans in all their beautiful brokenness. You don't have to be healed to be loved by Him. You don't have to have it all together. The woman who brings her whole, broken, furious, grieving heart directly to God - she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be remembered beneath all the hiding.
Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to unravel religious trauma, instill God's truth, and create your new story alongside women who truly understand. Learn the language of lament, discover God's divine principles, and step into the freedom you've been longing for. Get all the details at TheComingHomeJourney.com.
About Debra
I'm Debra Schafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who love God deeply but feel exhausted by religious performance and pressure. I know this path personally - I've lived the devastating loss of being told my grief was spiritual failure - and I've seen what happens when women finally bring their unfiltered hearts to God: they discover they were always lovable.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you feel permission to bring your whole heart to God, would you share it with someone who needs this gentle truth? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women find their way to healing religious trauma and discover that their pain doesn't make them unlovable.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Wednesday Oct 01, 2025
Wednesday Oct 01, 2025
Do you ever catch yourself walking on spiritual eggshells—even in spaces that should feel safe?
Maybe you find yourself scanning the room before you speak, wondering if your question will be received well, or if your honesty might be labeled as having "the wrong spirit." Maybe you've learned to adapt, to become whoever the room needs you to be, because authenticity feels dangerous. If you're a Christian woman who loves God deeply but still feels like you're constantly braced for correction or rejection, this episode will help you understand why—and show you the path to the spiritual safety you're longing for.
Today we're exploring the profound truth that could heal one of religious trauma's most painful barriers: your hypervigilance wasn't paranoia - it was wisdom protecting you from real spiritual danger.
Episode Description
If you've been living in spiritual hypervigilance, constantly adapting to survive instead of standing in your truth, this episode will revolutionize how you understand safety in your faith. Today we're healing the devastating "I'm Not Safe" barrier by discovering how to distinguish between God's safe love and the harmful dynamics that taught you to live on guard.
Through a personal story of spiritual manipulation disguised as loving guidance, we'll explore how religious trauma teaches us that safety comes from human approval rather than God's unchanging love. You'll learn why your constant vigilance wasn't paranoia—it was wisdom responding to real spiritual danger.
Most importantly, you'll discover how to separate God from the people who misrepresented Him, and find the courage to trust your own God-given discernment. This isn't about avoiding all spiritual guidance, but about learning to hear God's voice directly instead of through human interpretation.
You'll walk away understanding that questioning isn't rebellion—it's relationship, and that God delights in your authentic heart, not your spiritual performance. Safety isn't found in avoiding all risk, but in the arms of a God who has prepared a future for you with hope.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why your spiritual hypervigilance was actually brilliant wisdom protecting you from real manipulation
→ The difference between healthy spiritual guidance and controlling authority that uses Christian concepts for manipulation
→ How to separate God's character from the people who misrepresented Him through fear-based teaching
→ Practical steps to practice authenticity with God first, then with safe people in your life
→ The revolutionary truth that questioning deepens relationship with God rather than threatening it
Healing Truth
You are safe in God's love, and that safety isn't dependent on anyone else's approval or interpretation of His will for your life. God delights in your authentic heart—questions, emotions, and all. You were never meant to live in spiritual fear. You were meant to rest in His perfect love that casts out all fear.
🎧 Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey - a six-month guided experience to learn the difference between God's safe love and harmful spiritual dynamics. Discover how to trust your own God-given discernment while staying deeply connected to your faith. This isn't about losing your relationship with God - it's about finding the safety to be authentic with Him. Details here: TheComingHomeJourney.com
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who've been taught that spiritual safety comes from human approval rather than God's love. I know this transformation personally - I've learned to distinguish between God's voice and human interpretation - and I've witnessed what happens when women discover they're safe to be authentic: they finally experience the freedom Christ died to give them.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you understand that your vigilance was wisdom rather than weakness, would you share it with someone who needs this truth? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women discover they're safe to question, feel, and heal in God's love.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Wednesday Sep 24, 2025
Wednesday Sep 24, 2025
What if your "character flaws" were actually brilliant survival strategies?
Maybe you've been looking at your people-pleasing, perfectionism, or emotional sensitivity and thinking, "Something is really wrong with me." Maybe you carry quiet shame about the ways you learned to cope, believing they prove you're selfish, manipulative, or fundamentally flawed. But what if you weren't bad - you were surviving? And what if you were brilliant at it?
Today we're exploring the truth that could heal one of religious trauma's deepest wounds: your survival patterns aren't evidence of your badness - they're evidence of your brilliance.
Episode Description
If you've been carrying shame about your survival patterns, believing they prove something is fundamentally wrong with you, this episode will revolutionize how you see your story. Today we're healing the devastating "I'm Bad" barrier by discovering the truth that changes everything: you weren't bad - you were a brilliant survivor.
Through Tekyia's powerful story of transformation from shame-driven faith to love-driven relationship with God, we'll explore how God-given gifts like sensitivity, intelligence, and compassion get repurposed as survival tools when trauma occurs. You'll learn the difference between the "shame lens" that sees character flaws and the "wisdom lens" that recognizes brilliant adaptation.
Most importantly, you'll discover how to reclaim your gifts from survival mode and use them for their original purpose - not just surviving, but thriving. This isn't about excusing harmful patterns, but about recognizing the wisdom in your survival so you can transform it into authentic living.
You'll walk away understanding that your sensitivity is a superpower, your intelligence is a gift, and your compassion is exactly what the world needs - not despite your survival patterns, but because of the brilliance that created them.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ The revolutionary difference between the "shame lens" and "wisdom lens" - and how it transforms your entire self-perception
→ Why your people-pleasing, perfectionism, and hypervigilance were actually God-given gifts being used brilliantly for survival
→ How religious trauma teaches us to see our natural gifts as dangerous, forcing them into survival mode
→ The "survival pattern appreciation" practice that helps you recognize your brilliance instead of your brokenness
→ Practical steps to reclaim your gifts for thriving instead of just surviving - moving from defensive to authentic living
Healing Truth
You are not a collection of character flaws that need fixing. You are a brilliant survivor with God-given gifts that got repurposed for survival when life wasn't safe. Those gifts - your sensitivity, your intelligence, your compassion - they were never the problem. They're your superpowers waiting to be reclaimed. You weren't bad. You were surviving. And you were brilliant at it.
🎧 Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to reclaim your God-given gifts from survival mode and learn to use them for thriving. Discover that what you've been calling brokenness was actually brilliance.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who've been taught to see their God-given gifts as character flaws. I know this transformation personally - I've learned to see my own survival patterns as brilliant adaptations - and I've witnessed what happens when women discover they were never the problem: they finally see themselves as God sees them.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you see your survival patterns as brilliant rather than broken, would you share it with someone who needs this reframe? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women discover they were never as bad as they believed - they were brilliant survivors whose gifts are waiting to be reclaimed.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way.
Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Wednesday Sep 17, 2025
Wednesday Sep 17, 2025
Have you been giving until you disappeared, believing that's what God wants from you?
Maybe you've spent years believing your worth is tied to your output - constantly proving yourself through spiritual performance, serving until you're empty, trying to earn God's love through perfect behavior. But here's a revolutionary truth: God never required your exhaustion. He asked for your presence - not your performance.
If you've been living like "a mirror that lies," constantly reflecting back your worth based on what you produce instead of who you are, this episode will change everything about how you see yourself and your faith.
Episode Description
If you're bone-deep tired from running on what feels like a spiritual performance treadmill, this episode reveals the profound difference between artificial motivation that depletes and natural motivation that energizes. Today we're healing the exhausting "I'm Not Enough" barrier by discovering that God never required your exhaustion - He's been inviting you into rest all along.
Through Kristina's powerful transformation from crushing striving to peaceful presence, we'll explore how religious trauma dresses itself up as virtue, convincing women that giving until they disappear is what faithful service looks like. You'll learn to distinguish between artificial motivation (driven by fear, guilt, obligation) and natural motivation (flowing from love, inspiration, genuine desire).
Most importantly, you'll discover that your worth was never meant to be tied to your output. This isn't about becoming less committed to God - it's about understanding that He wanted your heart, not your hustle. You'll walk away knowing how to stop living like a mirror that lies and start reflecting back the truth of who you really are.
You'll finally understand that trauma dressed in religious language convinced you to serve from depletion, but God's invitation was always to serve from overflow.
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ The life-changing difference between artificial motivation (depleting) and natural motivation (energizing) - and how to tell which one is driving you
→ Why "giving until you disappear" isn't virtue but trauma dressed in religious language
→ How the belief "you are only as worthy as your output" gets installed in religious environments
→ The "motivation check" practice to help you distinguish between serving from fear versus serving from love
→ Why God asked for your presence, not your performance - and what divine rest actually looks like
Healing Truth
You are not only as worthy as your output. God never required your exhaustion - He's been inviting you into rest all along. His love for you isn't conditional on your performance. The woman who serves from natural motivation, who rests without guilt, who knows her worth isn't tied to what she produces - she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be remembered beneath all the artificial striving.
🎧 Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report that shows you where artificial motivation has replaced natural inspiration, plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit - including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community - all completely FREE.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com - a six-month guided experience to discover the difference between artificial motivation that depletes and natural motivation that energizes. Stop giving until you disappear and learn to serve from the overflow of knowing you're already enough. Get all the details at TheComingHomeJourney.com.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who've been giving until they disappeared, believing that's what faithful service looks like. I know this exhaustion personally - I've learned the difference between serving from depletion and serving from overflow - and I've seen what happens when women discover God never required their exhaustion: they finally find the rest their souls have been aching for.
Listener Love
If this episode gave you permission to stop running on the performance treadmill, would you share it with someone who needs that freedom too? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women discover they don't have to earn God's love through exhaustion - they can rest in knowing they're already enough.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way.
Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.
Friday Sep 12, 2025
Friday Sep 12, 2025
Have you ever felt that tension between the God you personally sense and the religious expectations around you?
Maybe you've spent years making yourself small to keep everyone else comfortable, while your true self remains hidden even from those closest to you. You've perfected what I call "helpful invisibility"—being indispensable but somehow still unseen. People notice your service, your put-together life, your ability to care for others, but no one really knows your dreams, your struggles, or who you are when the lights dim.
Episode Description
If you've ever felt invisible in the ways that matter most—seen on the surface but unknown in your depths—this episode is for you. Today we're exploring the #1 hidden barrier of religious trauma that keeps Christian women feeling unseen: the belief "I'm invisible."
Through Simone's powerful story of navigating the tension between the God she sensed and religious expectations around her, we'll uncover how religious environments can teach women that being seen is dangerous, prideful, or inappropriate. You'll discover why invisibility isn't humility—it's often a survival strategy that once kept you safe but now keeps you from the deep connection with God and others that your heart is longing for.
This isn't about becoming the center of attention. It's about recognizing that you were never meant to disappear, and that the God who sees you has been calling you by name out of hiding and into the light all along. Through biblical grounding in the story of the woman with the issue of blood, you'll see how Jesus stops everything to notice those who feel invisible and calls them "Daughter."
In this episode, you'll discover:
→ Why "helpful invisibility" is actually a trauma response, not a spiritual gift—and how to recognize it in your own life
→ How religious trauma teaches women that being seen is dangerous for their souls and spiritualizes self-erasure as virtue
→ The beautiful truth about Jesus stopping everything to see the woman who touched His robe—and how He restores her name, place, and visibility
→ One simple practice called "the one true thing" to start letting yourself be seen in small, safe ways
→ How your visibility becomes an invitation for other women to step out of hiding too
Your Practice for This Week
When someone asks how you are, pause and share one true thing instead of automatically saying "fine." Notice what it feels like to let yourself be known, even in that small way.
Healing Truth
You are not invisible to the One who made you. You never have been. Learning to be seen by others starts with remembering that you've always been seen by Him. The woman who shows up fully, who speaks truth, who takes her rightful place—she's not someone you have to become. She's who you've always been, waiting to be uncovered.
🎧 Ready to go deeper?
Discover your personal healing path: Take our free Religious Trauma Assessment at ReligiousTraumaQuiz.com and uncover which of the 12 hidden barriers might be shaping your relationship with God, yourself, and others. You'll receive a personalized report plus my complete Essentials Starter Kit—including my book He Is Enough, Truth Over Tradition mini-course, live reading circles, and access to our supportive community—all completely FREE as my thank you for taking this brave step.
Transform your story completely: Join the Coming Home Journey at TheComingHomeJourney.com—a six-month guided experience to unravel religious trauma, instill God's truth, and create your new story alongside women who truly understand.
About Debra
I'm Debra Shafer, spiritual healing coach for Christian women and founder of the Healing Religious Trauma Circle. For over seven years, I've walked alongside women who love God deeply but feel silenced, anxious, or spiritually disconnected because of hidden trauma. I know this path personally—I've lived it myself—and I've seen what happens when women finally name what harmed them: they come alive again in their faith.
Listener Love
If this episode helped you feel less alone, would you share it with someone who needs this gentle truth? And a quick review on Apple Podcasts helps more women find their way to healing religious trauma and discover the safe, loving relationship with God they've always longed for.
This isn't surface-level faith advice. It's soul-level restoration for Christian women healing from religious trauma who long for inner peace, spiritual healing, and the ability to trust God completely. Through addressing generational trauma and nurturing true connection, we help you experience God's love in the deepest way. Strengthen your relationship with a safe, loving God.